I simply never thought to actually organise something myself; it didn’t occur to me that I could be the instigator. You can start yoga (I did), join a cooking class, bootcamp, walking loneliness in sobriety groups, cycling clubs, martial arts … somewhere that you’ll meet other people. Like making friends in AA, you aren’t going to solve your loneliness problems going to one class.
Loneliness is a state where one feels isolated from their immediate environment as well as the world at large. Loneliness makes a person feel like an outcast with no companions. Self-care in sobriety goes beyond physical health; it encompasses mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
The Path to Recovery
As we mentioned, being alone is different from feeling lonely, and being alone can be beneficial. Everyone hits a point in their day or week when they are not around people, so it is important to know how to not only cope with those moments but to take advantage of them. It can be difficult to create new friendships later in life. If you have low self-esteem or high anxiety it can be even more daunting. Regularly turning up every week meant I got to know the other people quite well over time. You may have lost some friends and certain social situations may no longer be viable for you right now.
Feelings of loneliness might be unique to you now, but they are quite common on the recovery journey—and for other people as well. Some statistics indicate up to 15 percent of people living in the U.S. are lonely. While it is healthy and important to acknowledge this transition and to let yourself grieve, be sure to recognize the silver linings. Maybe someone has brought along some drugs, hoping to amp up the party. You may already have a strong group of friends and supportive family members who are willing and ready to hang out with you at a moment’s notice so that you can keep loneliness at bay. You may also find that your 12-Step program (or other recovery support program) provides some of the ongoing interaction you need to stay engaged with others.
Human beings are social creatures. The need for touch, affection, and closeness with other human beings is in our very nature.
I now understand that to truly tackle loneliness you have to look within and reach out to others. The danger of not tackling your loneliness in sobriety is relapse. Loneliness is a major trigger for relapsing back to your old drinking habits. This is because loneliness can lead to depression, shame and further isolation, then eventually relapse.
- This may be a long-term project but it has to start somewhere.
- However, staying committed to your sobriety and continually working to make amends with people in your life will help to combat feelings of loneliness in sobriety.
- Finding other people going through what I was experiencing was a relief and definitely helped me feel connected.
- However, now that you aren’t obsessed with drinking and aren’t filling up your time drinking, you might find some great people you never really got to know at your workplace.
- If you have a job or are going to get a job, you can find people to hang out with there.
Being honest and open about your journey towards sobriety can foster deeper connections. Sharing your experiences can not only help in building trust but also in finding others who are on similar paths or who understand your challenges. Building new connections is a vital part of developing a sober social network. This can be achieved through joining clubs, attending community events, or participating in activities that align with your interests. Engaging in sober activities not only helps in meeting like-minded individuals but also in discovering new hobbies and passions.
How Do You Protect Yourself With a Family History of Addiction?
Earlier, we suggested that some people in recovery may isolate themselves because they are embarrassed about past words or behaviors. Unfortunately, this kind of avoidance of others is likely to lead to loneliness, which in turn can quickly lead a person down a spiraling path of negative thoughts. This loneliness can have real consequences for your recovery, your mental health, and even your physical health. Feeling both bored and sad is a bad combination for recovery. This doesn’t come as much of a surprise because posts on social media are showing a filtered version of how other people live. It’s almost impossible not to compare one’s life with others.
If relationships are broken beyond repair, this is the time to practice acceptance. Remember, it’s okay to feel lonely—and remember that being alone does not necessarily equate to experiencing loneliness. View the idea of “being alone” as an empowering opportunity for independence—not something to be ashamed of. Yes, there might be a new emptiness in your life after recovery, but you have also left treatment with a slew of new coping skills and a clearer view of yourself and of your values. Let these additions fill the spaces as you explore what a sober life and self can hold. You might find yourself emerging from treatment with a lot of empty spaces that used to be occupied by addictive behaviors, substances, and toxic relationships.
